Something needs to change

Are we too young for this life?

If you’ve seen the video, you’ll know just how small our village is. We have great contact with the people around us, but they’re in a different stage of life.

Sometimes I wonder: did we make this move too early?

At the same time, I know we don’t have to stay here. And it’s not as if we didn’t know what we were getting ourselves into.

We knew we would become part of an aging community, and that finding people in a similar stage of life would be challenging. However, knowing that beforehand wasn’t a reason not to give this life a try. And now that I’m experiencing some of those challenges, it’s not a reason to leave either.

There is still so much that makes us want to stay. We’re learning about nature, fishing, growing and finding our own food, not to mention everything the renovation is teaching us. We enjoy being able to focus on the more basic things in life, and there’s something very satisfying about building a life around those things.

So I guess experiencing the challenges is simply part of figuring out what works for us, and what doesn’t.

Lately, I’ve started to realise that perhaps something is missing for me. Not necessarily something big, but a different kind of stimulation.

I really enjoy the outdoor-focused life and the space we have here. But sometimes I miss being able to spontaneously do something completely different. To go to a shop, meet a friend, see a concert, or simply be around more people. To get a different kind of stimulation without having to plan an entire day around it.

And the more I think about it, the more I wonder if it’s not just city life I’m craving, but the feeling of movement in general.

That’s quite paradoxical, because we’re constantly busy. With the house, the garden, work, and all the things we’re still learning to do here. There is always something that needs our attention. But maybe being busy isn’t the same as feeling stimulated. Maybe I’m missing the kind of stimulation that comes from new ideas, new people, new experiences. From simply having things happen around you.

We’re learning a lot, but our lives also exist within a relatively small world. Sometimes I feel like I need to step out of it, to encounter new ideas, different perspectives and experiences that make me think, question and grow. Not just within this life, but as a person.

As you can tell, there’s a lot of mental gymnastics going on. And with these still somewhat confusing thoughts, I leave to the Netherlands. A friend’s wedding was a good reason to get away for a little while.

I’m curious to see what insights I’ll return with.

Thank you for coming along!

Jule Noah